Peter Schjeldahl And I Are Different: An Exploration

I love and cherish the New Yorker magazine, but it just. Comes. So. Often. Am I right, New Yorker subscribers? There is a lot in each issue! It's not like Us Weekly where you can knock one out during your lunch break. That thing is DENSE. And you get one and then a week later you get another? Craziness. (I'm just teasing, New Yorker. Don't ever change. Kisses.)

Anyway, I was reading the New Yorker from last April, and there was a cool little article by Peter Schjeldahl about a show at the Frick that included pieces on loan from the Norton Simon.

I feel like the Norton Simon keeps sort of a low profile in LA, but yet it's amazing. Peter Schjeldahl said something like "It has the best painting collection on the West Coast." That is a guesstiquote, because I don't have access to the article because back issues of the New Yorker online is by subscription only (cough*EVIL*cough.)

Schjeldahl's article addresses the idea that memory is inherently subjective and imperfect, especially when it comes to art. We might remember one detail in stark clarity, but completely forget another aspect of a painting. He makes specific reference to a painting by Francisco de Zurbarán,"Still Life with Lemons, Oranges, and a Rose." Here's the painting:


I can't say this painting is lighting my fire, which would probably be way #1 in which I am different than Peter Schjeldahl. He LOVES this painting, specifically the citrons (they're obviously citrons and not lemons - what are you, an idiot?) The second way I am not like him was revealed when he started talking about how the items in the painting are supposed to represent the virtues of the Virgin Mary. He was like "Yeah, strength and purity and blah blah blah, I don't care about symbolism."

People, he literally said BLAH BLAH BLAH. At least, I think he did...it's too bad that I can't access the original article online to quote him in full. But anyway the point is that he could care less about symbolism, and just wants to talk about how the citrons are yellow and green and stuff.

I think symbolism is truly my favorite part of art. When Paul and I were at the Louvre, there were a million paintings of like, very specific scenes from myths or the Bible, or tableaux that looked like a woman carrying a basket, but were actually complicated political endorsements. Luckily, we had the museum audioguide, and I was so excited to sit and listen to the soothing British voice explain that this Flemish painting is actually an allegory condemning lust, and the fish represents immoral women and the sausage links represent wicked men, and the kitchen maid represents purity, and the dog at her feet is the holy spirit, or whatever. I mean, it was truly fascinating to me to hear how each detail was like a puzzle piece in the story of the painting's meaning.

So there you go: Peter Schjeldahl and I are different. If you want proof, here is a picture of me sitting on a bench, as the audioguide whispers to me all the secrets of the paintings.


Oh and P.S., if you are looking for an excuse to visit the Norton Simon, we have a great class coming up around Ingres's 'Comtesse d'Haussonville,' which is actually on loan from the Frick (they share!) Click here for details.

Lady Gaga is Wearing the Alexander McQueen Space Alien Shoes!

People, Arts Blog is in an uproar today over Lady Gaga's new video. As we were doing work sanctioned research by watching the recently released Lady Gaga video for "Bad Romance," we noticed something that made us squeal with delight.

LADY GAGA IS WEARING THE ALEXANDER MCQUEEN SPACE SHOES FOR HOT ALIENS.

If you need to catch up, read this post. I'll wait.

Crazy shoes, right? Anyway, the actual video is a little bit too risque to post here (there is a part with a tushy), but you can go join the millions of people that are watching it on YouTube right now. Luckily, Jezebel has a breakdown of the video with stills, and in those stills you can see the shoes.


These are the crazy shoes that looked like squeezed out ropes of toothpaste sticking together that I didn't love at first. However, I will say that I am warming up to them a bit here on Gaga's feet.


Here is a close-up of the giant mood ring hoof shoes. She is in motion here, which is pretty awesome feat.


Here she is wearing an entire outfit that looks to be the same material and design as the shoes. Is it a little too matchy-matchy? Does it matter if you live on Alpha Centari?


And finally, the toothpaste shoes again. They definitely go with her outfit, which is a bear.

In conclusion, Lada Gaga is the parton saint of Arts Blog, and we are glad that she is visiting this planet to do good, and make catchy dance music.

Better Now? Or Now?

When I go to the optometrist, he sits me in the chair and pulls the eye thingy up to my face. Then he clicks through the lenses, saying "Better now (click) or now (click). Better now (click) or now (click)." Sometimes it's hard to tell which is better! I have to really focus (zing!) to determine which image is clearer.

These pictures from the class Environmental Portraiture reminded me of that experience, but in this case, there's no question about the better image. Instructor Josh Sanseri has set up a before and after that illustrate how a portrait can be transformed with the right techniques.



The model here is student Larry Wurzel. Volunteer in class, people! Also, these shots were taken on campus in Dodd Hall, and I can honestly say, Dodd has never looked better. So majestic! It really looks like a sanctum of learning.

If you want to know what secret photo magic Josh used to transform blah picture A into oooh aaaah picture B, take the class! I am not expert enough to say in detail, but I have sat in on enough classes to know that it probably has something to do with the white balance. Right?

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

For Halloween, 3-D artist and videogame designer Eric Testroete created a papercraft blow-up of his own head, and wore it over his regular head.

This strikes me as one of the eerier things I have ever seen. On his website, Eric says that he "really wanted to get the faceted geosphere look with wireframe."

Yes indeed! Apparently he was also inspired by "big head mode" in videogames, which is a secret thing that you unlock, and then all the characters' heads get blown up 150%. What?

I recommend checking out the whole set of photos, but here are some images of Eric's unholy costume, and the steps he took to create it.

Way to go Eric! David Lynch is ready for your close-up.







Via Laughingsquid

Kevin Van Aelst - Sublime Simplicity

I love and am tickled by the work of artist Kevin Van Aelst, who represents complicated ideas with everyday, mundane objects. In his own words:

"My color photographs consist of common artifacts and scenes from everyday life, which have been rearranged, assembled, and constructed into various forms, patterns, and illustrations. The images aim to examine the distance between the ‘big picture’ and the ‘little things’ in life—the banalities of our daily lives, and the sublime notions of identity and existence."

Though I don't 100% understand what that means, I love the way that these objects, which you would pass by everyday without a second glance, become magical and meaningful in the photographs.

Kevin Van Aelst Website

Go with the Flowchart

What is it about flowcharts that I find so amusing? They are so factual and grey and math-based. But combine them with pop culture, and the uncanny melding of stoicism and irreverence makes for great fun. It's like if your grumpy, musty old calculus teacher suddenly busted into the humpty dance.

Take this flowchart for the song "Hey Jude". "Hey Jude" is a great song. No one is disputing that. But break it down into its composite elements, and you get this adorable map of the lines, chorus, and of course the final, joyous Na na na NA NA NA NA. Look how fun (and surprisingly repetitive) "Hey Jude" is now! It's like a subway map, where you could catch the train at Don't and ride it all the way to Better Better Better Better WAAA.

Click to enlarge

I think this next one is less technically sucessful (as a flowchart) but more enjoyable (as an awesome song). It's "Total Eclipse of the Heart" - the flowchart.


Here is my question: where is "And if you'll only hold me tight/we'll be holding on forever"??? I realize that the whole, 6.5 minute song is not represented here, but those are vital, soaring lines.

A while ago I had a conversation with my boyfriend where he told me that the same guy who wrote "Total Eclipse of the Heart" wrote most of the songs on Meatloaf's Bat out of Hell, including a personal favorite, "I Would Do Anything for Love." I was like "Get out of town," but then I thought, wait a minute, they are actually really similar! They start of all quiet and melodic, and then in the middle they each rachet up a key and become all belty and powerful (think about "And I need you now tonight/and I need you more than ever!" vs. "I would do anything for love/anything you've been dreaming of." )

If you take away only one thing from this blog post, I guess it should be that I enjoy the work of Jim Steinman.

Via Laughingsquid

Norman Rockwell Took Painterly Liberties

Gizmodo has an interesting post about Norman Rockwell, the "original king of Photoshop."

"Wait just a minute" you may be thinking to yourself. "I'm pretty sure Photoshop was not around during America's golden 40s and 50s."

You would be right, but as the new book Norman Rockwell: Behind the Camera illustrates, Rockwell set up carefully posed and art-directed photo shoots, which he later referenced as he created his paintings. Taking a face here and a gesture there, he combined subjects into whole scenes, none of which existed in the original photos.

Photo Fakeouts: Reality is Dark and Crowded

Oyster.com is a website that publishes hotel reviews for popular travel destinations. Apparently they have a team of people who run around to these hotels and stay in the rooms and eat the room service and go in the pools and take pictures of everything so that you can see what it's actually like to be there. First of all, sign me up for that job, etc. Secondly, I feel like Oyster.com is a terrible name. I had spent probably 15 minutes on the website before I realized oh, they mean "The World is Your Oyster." I'm sorry, but it just makes me think of slimy mollusks.

But anyway, they have this great feature called Photo Fakeouts. They take promotional images of hotel pools, rooms and beaches, and run them alongside pictures that their staff actually took when they visited the hotel.

I think this is just a stunning example of how staging and some Photoshop can make an average picture look completely different and enticing. The fakeouts are not egregious, but something like changing the color and light quality of the sky, showing an uncharacteristically empty beach, or pulling the old "pool trick" create images that are not representative of the experience you will have when you visit.

Here are some of my favorites:



Oops! Instead of your girlfriend's french braid, the beach has gigantic cranes. And it's dark. And there are other people on it.



I would not expect a hotel room to look exactly like, or ever particularly like, the picture in a brochure, but this is barely recognizable as the same place.



The promotional picture is so 80s, I love it! After the buffet, the promotional picture is going to a jazzercise class. Also, gross.



Poor little pool! Can you imagine if you were this pool posing for your big photo shoot, and you're so excited, and then finally the pictures are released, and you're like "This doesn't look like me at all!" Then you would burst into tears, but no one would know, because you are a pool.

Via Lifehacker

Travel Photography on the Cheap

The NY Times has an interview with travel photographer Robert Caplin that is full of interesting tips about equipment, saving money, and the controversial topic of iPhone photos. He addresses many of the questions that I often get from students, so I included a few below:

Q: If you only had $500 to spend on a new camera system, what would you get?

A: If I was in a pinch, they make these new point-and-shoots, the Canon G9, G10, G11 series. I’ve never owned them, but I’ve heard only raves about them. I’d try to get the point-and-shoot with the most manual control possible that gave me the most ability to decide how I want to make the image. And if I’m looking to save a buck, I always look on craigslist because it’s not a bidding system.

Q: Photoshop costs $699. Is there a cheaper version?

A: If you’re really going to get into travel photography, getting a professional program is key. There is a more consumer version of Photoshop — Photoshop Elements (about $80). It’s a very dumbed-down version, but it’ll get you the basics that you need for photo editing.

Read the full interview here. Dude also has a charming blog.

Alexander McQueen Space Shoes for Hot Aliens

Listen, I am no shoe novice. I love shoes. I have worn a crazy shoe in my day. Heels and platforms and zippers do not shock me. Sometimes I go into Nordstrom just to touch the designer brands.

But people, the shoes featured in the Alexander McQueen show for Fashion Week were crazy. No - they were criz-azy.

First of all, let's all say a silent prayer for the models who had to sashay around the runway in what are basically enormous bedazzled hooves. This girl is like "Focusfocusfocusfocus"


Second of all, I LOVE THEM.

Well, specifically, I love the hoof-looking ones. I think the shape is so artistic and elegant and cartoonish. They look like something a very posh lady alien on Dr. Who would wear. When you're wearing heels, your feet already don't really look like feet anymore, so why not go one step further and make your feet look like you live on the forest-planet Petalunia, and are going to a ball to dance with a dashing lobster-prince?




I'm not so crazy about the ones that look like pastel coral, but they get points for pure spectacle. And then there's the "Old West robot lady gunslinger" model, which one blogger called "the most wearable of the collection" and I was like "Ha, awesome."


The moral of this post is that I think these shoes are avant garde and artistic and silly and fun. Purse Blog has a great feature that shows many of the shoes in great detail, so check them out! Finally, here is a picture of Alexander McQueen being like "Yeah, I did this. YOU'RE WELCOME."